Our lives are not our memories; they are lived supported by our memories, for one does not need memories to live, only to live in a certain way, as a certain person.
It seems that if our memories changed, that we would change, that we would not live our lives the same way as we would with other memories, for our memories are part of our conditioning, part of who we are. We live our lives supported by our beliefs which are supported by our memories and our attitude towards them both. I am intrigued by the question of what makes us who we are. It is hard to get away from the idea that our memories make us who we are. But do they? If, rather, our attitudes make us who we are then our memories become more arbitrary, and it is our attitude towards our experiences, towards the world around us, and our memories, whatever they may be, that makes us who we are. To see our attitudes as what makes us who we are, it seems to me that that would give us much more control over who we are, and subsequently our lives. Is attitude the creator of what we are? Is attitude the who creating the what?
Of course, the question arises as to whether our conditioning, our memories, our particular experience of the universe partly determine our attitude by which we think about those memories and experiences; or, on the other hand, no matter what a person’s experiences may have been, he has the opportunity, the innate potential, to have an open-minded, courageous, seeking attitude, thereby seeing his experiences and memories in a new light. While some may have more to fight against to get there, they still can do so, if they are both aware of the choice and make the choice to do so. I also do not think that this matter of degree can be drawn along wealth/poverty lines, class lines.
I almost see the process as being one of liberating ourselves from our own ignorance, our own illusions, which distort our attitudes, and therefore what we create ourselves as.
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From my personal notes, 1/2/00
